The Big Stinky: A Smell You Can't Get Out Of Your Nose

I have three babies in diapers. That being said, I want to mention that scented candles are part of my diaper budget.

I don't know how many sets of multiples in diapers there are in our city but I guess we have the stinkiest garbage can in the whole county! This sad can sits out in the blistering sun, sweltering in daytime heat, even as I took this picture I could feel its guts sweating great wafts of rotten yuck.

We call it the Big Stinky because you hold your breath, lift the lid, throw your trash in and run like heck before lid slams down, the smell swallows you whole and you die of asphyxiation. 

When I change the babies and all three of them are stinky, I ask the girls to run the diapers out to the Big Stinky for me. Not even in the beginning did they ever question, they knew instinctively where and what the Big Stinky was. I time them when they do diaper runs to the Big Stink, Hazel can drop a stink bomb in 24 seconds flat and make it back in the house! 

My sweet neighbor, who has lived here longer than I have lived and has taught us more about being a good neighbor than anyone else, washes her can about every 6 months. She also has a garden that is so beautiful she named it Winsong Gardens and I can slip into its shady peace for temporary relief when I need it. 

She says to me of her yard and garden, 'I never had anything this nice when I was a young mother.' I hope she knows how much I value her advice and non-judgment. I hope her compassion extends to the Big Stinky who sits and glares its abhorrent odor at her as she hand waters pots full of beautiful flowers on the other side of the driveway.

Highly Offensive

Hey! Hey you! Yah, the one looking at me, listen up...

I take total offense to the fact that you eat dirt and chew rocks

But turn your little noses up at my cooking! 

What's More American Than Captain America?

We found old garbage can lids in the backyard when we cleaned it out years ago. The girls have a thing for the Avengers, eh, could be worse.

For Hazel and Claire, Thursday nights have become movie night with dad. Starting on Monday they are jonesing for Thursday, 'Mom is tonight movie night?' They really look forward to it and Nate seems to enjoy having his little girls crawl on him with laptop in hand, turning on a Netflix and then falling asleep. 

In his attempts to stay awake he has introduced them to old cartoons he enjoyed like The Avengers, Spiderman and Superman. The other day Claire said that she didn't like princesses anymore only superheros, while I know that to be a pile of baloney, I appreciate that it isn't only about princesses anymore.

I, for one get a kick out of watching the My Little Pony series on Netflix (with the girls) and I have it on good authority that quite a few other mothers do. Just don't ever make me watch Dora again.

Being Married To Supermom

Some will despise this post, they'll tell me to go out and get some real problems...but read on.  I know I did it to myself. I got my feet kicked out under me, it was a total surprise and I reacted poorly. I thought I was such an independently happy little mother, turns out I was wrong about being independent.

I got home from girls camp last weekend. I was up in the mountain air, loving the girls and being with my leader friends but my heart was thinking of how Nathan was doing and hoping he wasn't having too tough of a time.

It turns out, maybe I should have stayed longer. Maybe I should have prayed for sick girls and teething babies. I was hoping for an, 'I'm so glad your home, I don't know how you do it!'

I got home late Friday night, house was clean. Laundry was kept up. Dishes done. Hmmm, maybe I should peek in on my babies. Babies clean, happy, sleeping peacefully, girls, same.
(I am surprised Nathan didn't greet me wearing an apron, with a bow in his hair!)

As our bathroom remodel drags out, so does the time between shaving.

The next morning, the girls looked at me in dismay. Why are you here? Dad and Grammy took us to the zoo, we went to the splash pad and played for hours. We ate at McDonald's and it was awesome. Why did you come home? Demoralizing.

I thundered around the house for a few days hurt, refusing love from anyone that could speak in sentences. I wasn't needed. Nate can do a better job than me with one hand tied behind his back. Maybe I should go back to work. Where's my old resume?

When he comes home from work, Nate gladly begins tidying toys and fluffing pillows. Nate helps with diapers and toilets, makes meals and reads stories. I am sure he is the reason we have multiples!! Actually Dr Andrews had something to do with it, but you know. Nathan helps carry my burden, but he usually runs with it, sometimes, I drag.

The man lives in a state of ready. Ready to read books, ready to play games, ready to cuddle. When Nate was a boy, he wanted to be a mother when he grew up. What a tribute to Pam, his momma.

He spent the week trying to woo me back to him, and the girls. Usually content with the joys of my life, I spent the week feeling sorry for myself and pushing everyone away. At one point, Hazel drew a picture of me and I had a sad face. I asked why it was sad and she said, 'Because you think we don't love you but we do.' 

I have the finest tunnel vision in town when it comes to my faults. Nathan is not perfect, he knows that. I am not trying to make anyone judge their spouse harshly. I just wanted to tell you how I struggle as a human, I want great cosmic powers, I need them now. I discount wisdom learned from 'time and experience', discernment and reliance on the Lord. Perfection doesn't come in 4 years of raising children, but over a lifetime.

Hazel cried to me the other day and the gist of her tears were because CC was so good and never got in trouble. 'Why did CC and dad get the gift to be good and you and I didn't?'

Ahhh. Here I am (humbly) being grouped in with the maturity of a 4 year old. 'You mean the gift to stay calm Haz, we all have the gift to be good. But yes, they have the gift to be calm."

That's So Last Season

Quinn and 'Ihi discover they both wore the same dresses to the ball

As if in silent agreement they both seemed to understand

They can't be seen together or they will never get asked to dance

Pool Babies

Alien Invasion

An alien spaceship landed in our back yard last night. You can come see our crop circles. At first Hazel and CC were confused.

Then they were indignant!!!

They rushed to protect the babies, but they soon realized there was not much to protect...ahem.

And then they knew fear, true heart pounding fear. Where did the aliens go after our house? Maybe they are at your house...

A Burden Shared, A Friend Made

I am home from church sick today.  After nursing sick babies through fevers this week, I finally succumbed. So we are all home from church getting better and Nate is still nursing the babies, the girls are nursing me, I have never had so many tenderly balanced cups of cold water brought to me or enjoyed so many lotions rubs and tuck in's from tiny hands. Sweet girls.

I don't watch TV on the Sabbath but I am sorely tempted to, in my misery. I will write to occupy my time instead.

If you have ever come over to visit me, I have chairs in the kitchen and I work, while you sit, we talk and laugh, tell stories or gripe, I wipe noses and load dishes too. I'll allow myself the luxury of slowing down, in a few years maybe. I am not trying to make a martyer of myself or look better than I am, I am what I am a slightly crazy, busy mom.  Heavenly Father totally gives me the power to live like this. I asked for it and for the most part, I love it!

For a few months, we hired a BYU student to come and clean or babysit. While the shirts got ironed and healthy dinners were made on those days, I usually came out more frazzled for it. It has bothered me ever since and now I am questioning why. Our student was fine, she did what she was asked, and we were just a job to her. But there was no heart in it. Nearest I can tell, what I really wanted in hiring out was someone to help relieve the burden of being a parent for a while. It is a heavy load and although Nathan carries more than his share, there are still 10 hours a day unaccounted for while he is at work. Ten hours to entertain, be creative, teach, read, play, practice, exhort, make meals, tidy, do laundry and hair, give bathes and hugs, kiss babies and hurts- ten hours where everyones emotional well being depends on you. Tall order.

There have been few people that can come in and lighten that burden for me. My mom and my mother in law for example. Sometimes, just the mere act of a friend being in my home can help keep my spirits soaring, a song in my heart and energy rolling. One such friend was Hannah, she is on a mission right now and I miss her dearly, if she never picked up another one of my babies ever, I would still miss her for her friendship and sense of humor- total package deal, oh and her eye liner techniques- who doesn't keep a lighter in their makeup kit?

She never waited to be asked, she never thought I might get upset if... she just did. She saw something that needed to be done and did it.

If you need to be asked to pick up a crying baby, even if you are willing, it's more of a burden than that parent should have to carry.

Hannah grew up around the corner from us. Her big brother Ben used to come over and we were his 'refuge' til he got too old for us. Ben and Hannah both had an innate ability to relieve burdens maybe it is a cool mind reading trick their whole family has, I don't know. Several years ago, we were digging out our driveway, Ben walked by asked if he could help and called some of his friends over too. It was no skin off his back, big muscle ball that he was, to help out but he made friends for life that day.

Hannah came along when I was big pregnant with the triplets. As though we had been friends all our lives, she eased her way into my heart and helped carry my load. Little girls got their fingernails painted and taken to play at her house, she fed them peanut butter sandwiches. We laughed together (being worried how this triplet thing was all going to go down), I hadn't had a good laugh in a while. We would talk about our growing up years, how experiences had shaped our beliefs and whether she should keep dating so and so. She was there when I needed her. After the babies were born she would often take midnight and 2 am feeding shifts because she claimed, she was just coming home from a friends party and was awake anyway. She would bring her friends to help feed babies. When Hannah was there, her light heartedness made my burden feel lighter.

This is so Hannah, nacho cheese chips from the hospital cafeteria and Utah truffles chocolate, dressing like a boy for days then doing a 180 and knocking us all out with dangly earrings and high heels, huge smiles and hugs, Lucky Penny eyeshadow, spicy food, BBQ, late nights -taking a snooze on the couch, sneaking in while I am napping to pick up a baby that's awake, playing with the girls, baby Wilson riding on a pig, wondering about her future and what it had in store, 4th of July firework with Gary and the gang, long boarding with the gang, going to work crazy early hours, happy meals toys, Lisa stories, Lori stories, PB and family, Sweet Emily, Houston Texas, (yuck, Texas).

You are not forgotten Sweet Hannah. Thank you.